Daily, Letters to Maddy, Madeline, Monthly Letters

16 Months

My Dear Madeline, Today you are 16 months old. Crazy! You are turning to such an awesome little kid. You are so much fun and we just love spending time with you. You have really become quite the little momma to your baby doll. We can't leave the house without it most days. You are… Continue reading 16 Months

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Daily, Letters to Maddy, Madeline, Monthly Letters, Parenting After Loss

12 Months – One Year!

My Lovely Little Madeline,    Today, my sweet girl, you are one whole year old!  That's 12 months, 365.242 days, 8,765.81 hours, or 525,949 minutes that you have filled our lives and hearts with so much joy, love, grace, and beauty.  You have filled my heart to overflowing, my darling girl.          As usual,… Continue reading 12 Months – One Year!

Daily, Letters to Maddy, Madeline, Monthly Letters, Parenting After Loss

11 Months

My Dear Sweet Madeline, Today you are eleven months old.  You are growing up so very fast.  We are just completely mesmerized by you.   You have such a sweet personality.   You are an incredibly happy little girl and I think it is because you know how very loved you truly are.  This last… Continue reading 11 Months

Daily, Letters to Josh, Letters to Maddy, Madeline, Parenting After Loss

On the Eve of Your First Birthday

My Dear Madeline Rose Louise,   Tomorrow is the BIG day.  I can still remember how anxious I was one year ago today.  I was so grateful to have made it to the finish line healthy and safe, but I was still so nervous and scared.  One thing you will come to learn about your… Continue reading On the Eve of Your First Birthday

Baby Loss, Daily, Joshua, Parenting After Loss

2 Years Without Him

I'm sitting here watching the Academy Awards with Patrick and Madeline. My mind keeps flashing back to 2 years ago, sitting in the hospital room, absentmindedly watching the Oscars trying to feel "normal." We ordered pizza and sat there staring at the tv. I let the mix of pain meds and Xanax take over and… Continue reading 2 Years Without Him

Baby Loss, Daily, Joshua, Letters to Josh, Monthly Letters

Two Years

Dear Sweet Joshua, Today you would be 2 years old. I want nothing more than to be planning a birthday party. Probably TMNT themed thanks to your dad's influence. I want to bake you a cake and watch you blow out the candles. I want to spoil you with presents and shower you with kisses… Continue reading Two Years

Baby Loss, Daily, Parenting After Loss

Fear and Loathing in Kansas City

I've been trying to explain my feelings lately. I've had a few who seem to think that at this point, nearly 2 years later and with Madeline here with me, that I should be "all better" now. Truthfully, some days, I feel like I am worse now at handling what happened then I was 2… Continue reading Fear and Loathing in Kansas City