I caught myself staring at your sleeping sister’s face last night just trying to catch a glimpse of you. I long to know what you would look like today. What your favorite color would be. What you would excel at, and what would make you laugh uncontrollably. I try to catch glimpses of you in the faces of your dad, your sister, your cousin. I figure if I put them all together I might see a bit of you. Did you know that we should be registering you for kindergarten next month? That’s so crazy. I’m sure you’d be excited to pick out a fun new back pack to take with you. Probably something with a superhero on it. The weather here is crazy today. Right now it is thundering and raining ice. I bet you’d think that was neat even though it would mean we wouldn’t be going anywhere fun for your special day. We’d just stay home and bake your favorite cake and your favorite dinner. We’d play games and watch your favorite movies while watching the ice out the window.

I miss you, Joshua Patrick. I miss you more with each breath. I hope whatever you are doing today it is special, I mean 5 is a big deal. Happy Birthday, sweet boy. We love you now and always.

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