I saw this poem today on Still Standing. I thought it was so beautiful. I take no credit for this. It was written by Leanne Carline in the memory of her baby boy. I can only say that I can relate to the emotions she captured. I would give anything just to hear Joshua’s little cry. To be able to hold him, kiss him, rock him in my arms as I tried to soothe his cries. There are so many things that I want to teach him. So many things I wanted to share with him. Moments and memories that I wanted to have with him, my son, my first born. My heart aches in ways that I never knew were possible. My arms literally hurt, longing to hold him. It is a pain that I wish upon no one, but one that I am learning is shared by so many. My heart breaks for everyone who has lost a child no matter how old. It is a pain, a loss, that no one should ever have to face.
“I’ll never get to see your smile or kiss away tears from your warm soft cheeks.
I’ll never get to hear you cry and sneak you naughty treats.
I’ll never get to hold your hand as we skip along the way.
I’ll never get to wave you off to school on your first day.
All that time you were tucked up inside I never imagined this is how things would end.
Your needs and wants, your cries and shouts, I’ll never get to tend.
Despite the short time we were together as one I love you more than you’ll ever know.
One day I’ll come to find you, then onwards together we will go.
My whole body aches with sadness, my tears they freely flow.
What it means to lose you, no one will never know. “